*Birth Parents
Welcome
If you are a parent who has experienced being separated from your child subsequent to adoption, Welcome! RIARG, although we began as a resource group for adoptees, we are making strides to expand our resource umbrella to include support for birth parents.* Over the course of time since RIARG began in October, 2010, parents occasionally contact RIARG inquiring for support groups in the area. Up until until this time we honestly have not been aware of any noteable support groups to recommend. So, now that we have our feet on the ground for adoptees we are looking forward to the opportunity for growth to be able to include a support group for birth parents.* If you are looking for support please consider joining us in any capacity you feel comfortbale.
A word from Caroline: group facilitator: Over time I have found a lot of comfort talking to birthparents who have gone through similar experiences. And while search and reunion stories vary as much as the paths each one takes us on, I feel talking and sharing is just good therapy.
As a Birthmother, I offer to share my experiences with other birth parents with hopes that others can also find some peace and answers just as I have in speaking with other brith parents over the years.
Birthmothers understand that a woman who has experienced giving her child up for adoption has been given many names; of those names, some are controversial and others just help define the personal relationship. However you chose to be recognized, you will be welcome without bias to this group.
Perhaps the term "Birthparent" isn't the most endearing of terms to reference an individual who endured the experience of relinquishing a child to adoption. Although there are other terms that have been coined over the years such as biological parent, natural parent, and first parent, to name a few, we try not to place much emphasis on any particular term as to avoid becoming inadvertently focused on issues that could be considered on the trivial side when stacked up against overall birthparent expereince. That said, whatever term you prefer is welcomed here.
We understand the birthparent experience is extremely traumatic that has been punctuated by loss, grief, repression, and an entire range of emotions which subsequently has seeped into the fabric of our lives and for some it colors the lens in which we now see life.
That said, we appreciate the full range of emotions each of us may experience and carry, of which can be very powerful and above all you are entitled to feel the way you do. Our support group's foucus is helping each other heal and/or find resolve the best we can and in doing so it is important to move, not necessarily past it, but in a direction as to not get caught in any particular pattern or loop that fostors deconstuctive behavior. For example, anger that manifestes from adoption absolutely comes along with the territory and is an emotion that needs and should be identified, discussed, validated, and vented. However, if you are birthparent experiencing chronic anger and/or rage, or any chronic emotion towards your adoption experience we urge you to seek a professional counselor as this group is not equipped to offer that level of support. Above all, it simply isn't fair to you if you join this group searching for that level of support and we can not offer it.
Thank you.
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